Another Fall

Today, despite Charity's cold and the unseasonably warm weather, we made our annual trip to Guse Farms for the pumpkin patch. I love this pumpkin patch because there are lots of simple little things for the kids to do there that are free and fun. There's a cornbox, like a sandbox, but filled with dry corn, and there's an old fashioned ring toss, life size checkers, a bean bag toss, and a rubber ducky race manufactured out of water spouts--the Itsy Bitsy Spider kind. Oh, and that's not to mention the little playground with a slide that Charity adored, the train, the snack shop that has a toy train that goes around and around and around, and (of course) the pumpkin patch.

We've been going to Guse farms since Charity was three months old. We always take her picture in front of the same hay bale. Here they are:

She certainly has grown, but it seems her temperament has changed a bit too, lol! Charity really didn't want to get her picture done in front of the hay bale this year, but I just had to do it, and I will continue--here's hoping for 18, 20, 25 or more years of pictures.

Although the picture might not show it, Charity actually had a great time at the pumpkin patch this year. She went right for the cornbox. I was absolutely amazed at her confidence. This is the child who, usually, refuses to go on anything at the park unless I am right there, walking next to her. She just jumped in that box and started to play. She was dumping corn on her head (at my suggestion--couldn't help it), and pretending to sleep in it. At one point, I jumped in there with her, just because it looked like fun. Last year, I had to get in so that she would get in!

Charity also had lots of fun picking out her pumpkin this year. She ran around the patch, tapping every single one like she was checking for firmness in the grocery isle! Oh, and I had to tear her away from this little slide--there was a big and a little slide on the playground, and she refused to go down the big one, but just kept going down that little slide again and again and again--it was great!

I will probably add a conclusion to this at some point, but for now, just wanted to get everything down while it was still fresh. She's still sick, but I'm glad she enjoyed the pumpkin patch!

Re-Organizing

Before I begin, I'd like to let you all know that I have exactly 15 minutes to write this.

I think in a previous post I mentioned that I have trouble being creative when I am surrounded by a mess. This is a big problem, especially because I almost always seem to be surrounded by exactly that. So, to help my creative juices keep flowing and to make my home "nicer" for Charity & Aaron, I've been trying to reorganize, declutter, and re-arrange as much as possible. To that end, one of my recent projects has been re-organizing the "dining area" in my home so that we could get a dining room table. And today we did.

Those gross yellow chairs have been around for forever, and now I'm looking for four or five nice kitchen chairs--anyone have any? The bookcase in the back is going to stay put, but the movies are going to relocate to the shelving I'm putting in my closet, and I'm going to sell that shelf at our garage sale. I think it looks GREAT! I'm very excited. Here are some of the other changes that are happening around here.

This is the butterfly rug I got Charity at the church garage sale. She loves it! She tells me "sitting on the butterfly.

Here is the toddler bed that I will be transitioning Charity to tomorrow (hopefully). I'm going to put it along one of her side walls so she can have the most floor playing space as possible.

That's all for now. Hopefully more later!

Mom (Noun)

What is a mom?


Wikipedia: A mother is a woman who has conceived, given birth to, or raised a child in the role of a parent. Because of the complexity and differences of a mothers' social, cultural, and religious definitions and roles, it is challenging to define a mother to suit a universally accepted definition. The masculine equivalent is a father.

In other words, the definition of the word "mother" is so complex that Wikipedia can't even attempt to do it justice, and Wikipedia is the people's encyclopedia. 

 Facebook is full of quizzes that promise to tell me what kind of mom I am:

The soccer mom?

The busy mom?

The over-protective mom?


Sometimes I feel like I'm a bad mom. I'm so busy, and my child keeps doing things I tell her not to do. The more I tell her not to do them, the more she wants to do them, so is the psyche of the two-year-old. And then, of course, there's the fact that the house is a mess, and at least now it is a mess because I'm in the middle of a massive re-arrangement. And if Charity is anything like me, her physical space has to be conducive for creation or her mind won't use its creative space. And nothing is more frustrating than having the tools to create and not being able to make it happen. 

Sometimes I feel like I'm a good mom. I am tasked with a great deal, and at the end of the day, I manage to have it done, or at least almost done. I take my daughter to the park and the festivals. If she wants to dance, she dances. If she wants to jump in a mud puddle, she does. I am all about freedom and natural results---most of the time. In general, I think I'm doing a good job because she always wants to be with me. 

Last week, I asked one of my students to write a poem about her writing process. This was supposed to be something simple, to get her thinking in analogies and to get her writing, but what she wrote was profound. It compared writing to relationships. One of the lines was something like, "First Drafts are like First Dates." I loved it. 


And I think being a mom is a lot like writing too. There aren't really answers. There are just choices we make in response to our situations. We just have to hope we're making the right ones.

Eat a Diaper!

It's official, my two-year-old is a teaser. She comes up to me with a gleam in her eye, and she says something silly like "Eat a diaper!" or "Eat a butterfly!" The other day, she actually picked up a diaper, said "Eat a diaper!" put it in her mouth, and pretended to eat it. She also loves to call me "daddy," "grammy," etc. It's pretty stinking hillarious. I think it also shows that she's the next Einstein, or something like that. However, she still can't quite manage to get the whole "don't go out into the street; it's dangerous" thing. Check out the big kid:

With her comedy act and my mad skills, I'm thinking I could give up this higher education thing and hit the road. We'll be millionaires before nightfall--what do you think?

In all seriousness, I have decided to do a little performing. (Start running now. I'll give you a headstart). I always actually enjoyed singing when I did it in high school and before. But I've never really found a venue that I feel comfortable in since. Now, PUC's having a "got talent" sort of a competition, and I'm going to sing a Beatles song with one of my friends. If you want to come, and you know me, send me a message. If you wan't to come, and you don't know me, that's awkward. If you don't want to come, and you know me, I understand. :)

Charity Inspired Research Thought:
I'm taking a class on computers & rhetoric right now, and last week we discussed literacy, and how the definitions of literacy (may or may not be) changing. I brought up that Charity uses the computer, and that's true. She comes and crawls up in the "big girl chair," I put on PBS Kids, and she clicks away. Sometimes she may try to destroy my $100 mouse. (EEEEEKKKK-LOL! It's a PUN! Do you GET IT!?) But other times it seems that she's really having fun. I wonder what benefits she'll get form her early over exposure to technology, and I wonder if any of them can be as bad as the "nay sayers" say.

Random Unrelated Thought: 
I was not hungry when I hate that HUGE bowl of Reese's cereal. I stand ashamed. Diet, move back three spaces.

Progress in Oragnizing:
Just so you all know, I...

• Have organized three closets, and I have only two reamining! 
• Have cleared out almost my whole dining room area.
• Have washed almost all my laundry.
• Have cleaned out the hall. 
• Have organized Charity's room.

I am woman, hear me roar. Tonight I'm going to party like it's 1921! :)

It's late, and my plans include finishing the first half of The Mayor of Casterbridge in the bathtub, so sorry if this post disappoints. I just had to get the teasing down! Enjoy eating your diapers, everyone!

The Semester of Twos

I haven't posted a blog since April. In the academic calendar, that isn't a long time, just a semester ago, but as I look over my last post, I realize just how long ago that was. I was so excited that Charity was stringing two words together. Now, she's speaking in full sentences and we have the most accurate conversations. What I mean by that is when I ask her something, she responds to me, and vice versa. I love watching her grow and change. Today when I went to get her up from her nap, which was 4 hours long, she looked like such a big girl with her hair down and her pjs on. There's a toddler bed in her room right now; we're going to transition her to it soon. Yet sometimes, she still looks so much like a baby.

When you've been a student for as long as I have, everything is measured in semesters, and this semester is the semester of twos. Charity is two. So far, the first half of her twoness has been frustrating, if not terrible. :) She's beginning to "shape up," now though, to use a cliche. I think she's just getting more used to her newfound ability to be. It must be difficult to be two and to suddenly realize that you can do things like refuse or disagree, express your opinion, analyze and verbalize. I try to imagine her tough moments as tryouts rather than tantrums. She's simply trying out that emotion or mode of expression. Once she gets that others really don't respond well to it, she'll stop. It's classic conditioning.

Another two this semester is the number of classes I'm taking. I actually type these words in a computer lab on campus. Charity is spending the night at my grandma's today, so I don't feel rushed to get home. I'm enjoying the silence for a few moments. Today was the first day of my first 600 level class, a class on computers and rhetoric. To tell you the truth, I was thinking about dropping it. I wasn't sure I wanted to take two classes this semester in addition to everything else I'm doing. But I think I'm really going to like this class, and the end of my MA is in sight for me, so I'm going to stick it out. The boy I drive to school says I shouldn't be missing church on Wednesdays, though. Well, I guess I'll have to see if the professor will move class. :)

I wish the number of classes I am teaching this semester would be two. Instead it's three, just downsized from a four. I'm teaching ENG 104--not 100 as it would turn out--in a learning community. The curriculum is completely new, and while this is going to be challenging for me, I'm excited. It is a refreshing change. I'm also teaching my private ESL classes, with students whom I adore, and a class at Portage Christian, which has been wonderful so far. However, doing this, in addition to tutoring at PUC's Academic Learning Center, writing online, and working at SADC will be challenging. I plan to face the challenge, and to get a 4.0, be a great teacher, and still have plenty of time to count the coins in the piggy bank with Charity.

Going along with the theme of twos--no one better ever accuse me of not knowing how to follow a vehicle--this is probably the second most important semester of my graduate career because of the fact that it is one of my last. I'm overloaded, but because it is ending. And I go on to bigger and better things. I have an idea of what those are, but prefer not to have it in writing as of yet. For now, I'll leave you with an image of two--Charity's two-year-old birthday cake she got for her birthday in August! Little girl is growing up!

Whew!

Things do not slow down--not for a second. Not even when you think they will. Yesterday, I didn't get home until 8PM. I was at the library making a mammoth amount of copies from 1:15-2:07, and I was teaching private ESL lessons from 2:30-6:30. Then, I went home to pick up Aaron and Charity and we went to ALDI (which is now carrying Indian food (YAY) for a limited time (BOO)) because we were out of food. $60 later, our cupboards are full until the next major shopping trip, which is the great thing about ALDI. $60 will feed you for 2 weeks; that's why my grocery bill is less than $200/month.

After getting home at 8, I couldn't concentrate. I was trying to work on revisions for a direct order through Ecopywriters, and it was draining me. Finally, I got it done, sent it in, and attempted to do some research for the Paul F. Fidler grant that I'm applying for with PUC for the first-year program we're studying. I got through two of the past recipients before thinking I could no longer handle life without Pepsi (I'd tried to boycot it that evening) and sent Aaron to the store. After cleaning Fester's cage, I decided I needed a bath, so then Alice Sebold's Lucky stole two hours of my life. :) Finally, I was in bed, only to wake up four hours later, kiss Charity goodbye, and head in to present my "She Said WHAT?" lesson on quoting--a favorite, I must say!

However, amidst the busy, is the good:

• Charity is now putting two words together often. She makes short sentences like "Mommy, up!" She's early on this--most kids don't do it until well into thier 2s, says linguistics in 2009. :)
• I am going to be teaching the new learning communities section of ENG 100 next year. It promises to be a great change!
• There is a slight possibility of me being made an assistant, assistant, assistant director of the writing center.
• NO ONE heard about the writing awards. I'm not a loser (yet).
• Charity's adorable hair can now be pulled back with barrets--awe!

Yawn. It's 5:04 and time for me to leave my office and go pick up Miss Charity. I hope the mail contains the $360 check that is over a week late. :/ I want to pay my pet fee and get a cat! (Although Charity will need to take some time to get used to the cat. At a party we went to last Friday, she was terribly afraid of the big, black "meow meow." She did enjoy seeing another baby, though, and dancing on command to the Black Eyed Peas' I Got a Feeling.

About Blogging

I realize I just updated this blog about five seconds ago. However, I wanted to take a second to discuss a few issues about my blog. Because I've done about five of these this month, let's take a FAQ approach.

1. Why do you blog?

I enjoy it. It's an easy way for me to keep track of what's going on in my life and Charity's. Some day, I'd like to have these to look back on. (Google, please don't go belly up and take my blog with you!)

2. Are you trying to market yourself?


NO! Apparently, today, half the battle of being a successful writer is marketing yourself. When I heard that, I promptly decided success was no longer in my goals. I still like to write and I still submit and publish, but I am in no way interested in spending half my life running a campaign to get you to read what I write. Right now, I'm focusing on finishing raising Charity, doing something good for this world, finishing my M.A., getting my PhD, and beating Super Mario Sunshine.

3. Geeze, don't you proofread this thing?

Right now, I'm just trying to keep it updated. One of the benefits of hypertext is that they are constantly in the revision and editing stage even after publication. (Read a crazy awesome article on this. I can't remember who wrote it.) Eventually, I will proof everything. But for now, you get it as crappy as it is. Aren't you special. :)

4. Will you update this blog regularly.

I will try, as I said, because I want to be able to record what is going on in Charity's life.

5. Are you trying to get lots of people to read this or make money? Is this why you post links?

No. I am not currently on Adsense nor do I have a lot of readers. If I get a lot of readers, it would make sense for me to sign up for Adsense. But neither of these events are my goals.

6. Why can't I comment on your blog?

I DON'T KNOW! I'm trying to figure that out. For now, comment on Facebook.

Distracting Charity & Commas

Ladies and gentlemen, the score is now Charity, 2, Flatware, 0. Still not enough of a lead to convince me to buy some plastic plates. Just yesterday Aaron was cleaning up the kitchen while we were getting ready to go out and I heard the telltale crash from the living room where I was sneaking in a few moments of Super Mario Sunshine. (Do not purchase this game, it will steal your motivation and free time!)

"She broke a plate," I hear from the kitchen--not like I needed the announcement. The score from above is only the most recent number. I am well aware of the sound of plate breaking at this point in time. The plate breaking is a symptom of the strange way that Charity eats.

I say "strange" not fussy because sometimes the problem is that she does not have enough mouth in which to fit more banana. Other times the problem is that she refuses to eat anything but crackers. And she says "hungry" five seconds after she eats. In a bizarre moment of memorological astuteness, I actually remember the first time she said the word, "hungry." We were walking into the apartment, and she said "eat! eat! eat!" And I, trying to be the good teacher mommy, said, "When you want to eat, you're hungry."

"Hungry," she replied, almost leaving out the /g/ and stretching the /i:/. I thought it was the cutest word she'd said since "Mommy."

Now I wish she would STOP saying it! It's "hungry" and "snack" and "cheese" and "milk" every five seconds! And of course I can't give her these things because she's getting more than she should for her meals already! My personal theory is that she's just learning to like eating, something that makes me a bit nervous. I like to eat, too, which is a problem.

But as long as I keep her distracted, she seems to be fine with three regular meals a day and a couple of snack times. One of the methods by which I can keep her even more and more distracted is going to the park--the "Dunes Friendship Land" park. There are some definite pros and cons to this. I feel a list coming on.

Pros:

• Charity loves walking around in the park. The little kids side is fenced in, so I can just let her go. She ignores the equipment, but really likes running around.
• Nice benches, good shade, and for the most part nice people IN the actual playground area. 
• Most of the equipment we like to use is in working order--the big people swings (I can't put Charity in a baby swing without getting a size 7 shoe imprint on my torso.), the slides, the tire swing.
• The park is within easy driving distance and do-able walking distance

Cons:

• STUPID TEENAGERS!! (Not the nice kind that might be reading this!) These kids look and talk like they crawled out of that "World's Strictist Parents" show on MTV. Actually, the "World's Strictist Parents" kids are much cooler. 
• Broken equipment! It stinks. The place has really gotten rundown since when it was first built. I REMEMEBER when it was first built. That's probably why (because I'm old, not because I remember it.)
• There is not a fence around the WHOLE park. So when Charity is ready to go into the big kids section, we are constantly fighting over the fact that she has to hold hands. I always win. I may or may not avoid the shoe print and the in-the-middle-of-the-park tantrum.   

Pros out weight cons in this case, and she really does love the park, so I'm going to continue taking her there. And I am going to CONTINUE calling the cops about those kids.

Another great way to get Charity's mind off of food is to assist her in playing with her Dora the Explora' (I love saying it like that!) toy castle, purchased from grumpy people at a garage sale this Saturday for the very high cost of $7. The castle is very cool. It's purple and there are secret passageways that she and Aaron understand and that confuse me. It came with grandma, who has wings (Can anyone tell me why grandma can fly?), Dora, a monkey, and a unicorn.

Watching Charity play with this castle is pretty darn amazing. She acts just like a little kid, NOT a baby! She makes the grandma go in one room and puts Dora in her chair. She works the secret passageways and makes neighing sounds for the unicorn. (Do unicorns neigh? It would make sense.) I will have to grab a video soon, now that I have a WORKING camera!

I feel like Charity's grown up in just a few days. She went from being a baby to being a little kid who hears me say naptime and whines "no" while trying to get me to read another story. She plays with big kid toys and walks up and down the stairs with me. She strings two words together to make little sentences. And she doesn't let me get ANYTHING done! :)

But for not getting anything done, I'm doing pretty well. Other than a few kids in my class who don't know that you're not supposed to cheat and make fun of other students, I have a lot going on. It's super busy, but also cool. I love seing my ideas being put into actions. I love being able to do homework in classes that actually infuence what I'm doing for the Skills Assessment and Development Center and in my classes.

And on the writing front, I'm now doing music reviews. Check this one out: http://rocknrollghost.com/2010/04/09/midas-fall-eleven-return-and-revert-monotreme.

I also rehauled our web site at SADC: http://webs.calumet.purdue.edu/skills/

And to top it all off, today we ate dinner AT THE KITCHEN TABLE for the first time since moving into this apartment a year ago! We had fruit salad (Charity wouldn't stop saying "yummy yummy"), hamburgers (I started letting her have meat), baked beans, and veggies. For dessert, I made a delicious chocolate cake with strawberries on top. I have a picture, but I'm not taking the time to upload it.

In self-reflection mode, after teaching my high school Sunday School class today, I think I taught myself something. Jesus had no place to lay his head. This is a big thing for me and my beliefs about capitalism and the way I think I (not you, necessarily) should live. Jesus also told us that we shouldn't worry about our needs because God will take care of them. However, he DIDN'T say that God will only take care of them if we WORK OURSELVES to DEATH! So more trusting should be done on my part. :)

I'm teaching my ESL students commas tomorrow. These are the most kick-butt sites I know to learn commas. Enjoy!

http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/604/1/
http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/598/1/
http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/692/1/

Morley University

When I was a kid, my mom used to joke that she had one kid learning to walk and one learning to drive at the same time, now that Charity's an aged 18 months, I'm really starting to see the role that learning plays in our lives all of time time.

I know, this is coming from a teacher, but it's true. I may have always appreciated and even loved to learn, but when I see the amount of words, phrases, and just things in general that Charity learns every day, it makes me realize what natural little learners we are from the start! Now, we've got three learners in our family, and the lessons seem to be endless. Here's a breakdown of what the Morley family is learning right now.

• Anticipating. Today when I walked into Charity's room, she was jumping on her bed. I responded by saying the "10 little monkeys" rhyme. Before I could get to the line about mama calling the doctor, Charity anticipated what was coming by saying "doctor"--she's learning to predict!
• Meditating. Upon realizing that my daughter is pretty much a carbon copy of her mother, I decided this would be a good skill to learn early in life. Now when I say, "breathe deep" she does it! She makes a big show of exhaling as well. I love it!
• Grant Writing. This one is for me. I'm working on a grant for a department on campus--getting paid. And I get to learn the process during a class I'm taking! LOVE THAT! :) 
• Parenting. This is one of those lessons that's not going to end any time soon for Aaron and me. Every day brings new challenges, especially when you have a child who is learning at a rate that far surpasses you. We've realized that we just can't move things to get Charity to stop touching them at this stage. We really have to say NO and just keep saying NO, as frustrating, repetitive, and difficult as that is.
• Association. This one is Charity's again. She's starting to really expand her memory. She remembers when we go to a certain location, and she can associate what we do there. When we go back, she's trying to repeat the same actions. She's also beginning to string words together to communicate an idea. It's exciting and scary at the same time. Seeing her communicate with me is wonderful, but I also realize that I have to start watching what I say. 
• Strength. Let's face it. The world is a pretty rough place toady. Each day, I think we all learn more and more how to cope. We learn that even when we can't be perfect, that doesn't negate the good we've done. And then we learn that there's still hope.

Have a Good Week!

 

My big girl playing with the other kids at a birthday party--another lesson learned. DON'T HOLD BACK WHEN THE PINATA BREAKS!

 

I Ain't Got no Stapler

This morning on the train to Chicago, I was reading my homework for class tonight--Assessing Written Texts. (I realize that I waited until the last minute to do my homework--but the important thing is that I got it done.) The topic was something you can't get away from if you're a writing teacher--the great debate: do we teach mechanics or critical thinking? And if we teach both, how the heck are we supposed to do that in an hour and 20 minutes? I was of the opinion that most people advocate teaching expression through writing and letting the "correctness" come naturally, that the only writing teachers who still give vocabulary and spelling tests and require students to diagram sentences have one leg in a retirement condo.

I guess I was wrong. The reading made it clear that there are still advocates of the perscriptivist way of teaching grammar and the focus on correct usage in the composition classroom. What I found interesting, however, was the fact that these fans now tend to come from other disciplines. Is this because we've been doing something wrong by focusing more on opinions, emotions, and reactions than commas and capitalization? Or is it because mosts biologists still don't seem to understand why expressing one's self would be important?

Regardless, I have to say that my position on the matter is this: content trumps context. But context is of great importance! The student who wrote me the following one-line e-mail certainly showed a lack of understanding of her audience:

"I ain't got no stapler."

In addition, when I don't correct these students' mistakes, I feel like I'm letting them down in some way. They tell me they've come from four years of high school education that amounted to pushing them through for NCLB money. They don't know why their papers are always full of red marks and stamped with a "D." If we took just a few days and focused on just that, it would be boring, but would it help. It's like I tell my husband, "If you put off cleaning for a week, you'll be unhappy for a week. If you clean now, you'll be unhappy for about two hours."

One thing I know for sure is that I don't want to teach Charity a prescriptive grammar, so she's afraid to come up with her own words and constructions that just express what she wants to say more clearly! Sometimes, you just have to tell your friend, "I'm righter than you are." More correct sounds stuffy. And more right is awkward.

But I hope I never get an "I ain't got no stapler" e-mail from her!

Addendum to Charity-icon

Charity can also say the following words:
Banana
Boy
Soup
Please
Good Girl
Wowee!
Ow!

The Charity-icon or the LexiCharity

On May 14, 2009, I updated my Facebook status to:

Miranda Morley just went to pick up Charity, who threw her arms in the air and said, "Mama!"

Since then, Charity's vocabulary has exploded. Exactly a year ago, I took a linguistics class, and I wrote the first post in this blog about how I studied Charity's linguistic development and concluded that Charity was the most advanced six-month-old on the planet. Although I passed that class in April, I'm still acting the part of linguist when I listen to Charity speak. From babbling a year ago, she now has a vocabulary of around 40 words, and she sometimes even strings them together to make little sentences. Although the 40 words is actually a great deal above average, the fact that she's speaking single words and just beginning to form sentences is actually just about what most babies do at her age. Still, too me, its as fascinating as the International Phonetic Alphabet. (No, really, I do find that very interesting! I just wrote an article on it!)

Charity's Lexicon

(Words she says)

 Names

Mommy

Daddy

Ity (Charity)

Jesus

Animals & Sounds:

Ducky

Meow-Meow

Woof-Woof

Bear

Clothes & Body Parts

Shirt

Jacket

Eyes

Nose

Glasses

Butt-Butt

Shoe

Socks

Food and Eating Words

Crackers

Milk

Ice Cream

Cheese
Yucky
Yummy
Bite

Other Words

Bath

Shower

No

Yeah

Uh-Uh

Uh-Huh

Bye-Bye
Hi

Uh-Oh

Amen

Elmo

Pumpkin Pie

Shut

Toy

Play

Nigh-Night

Bot-Bot (Robot)